THE WOMEN IN 'LITTLE WOMEN'

Little Women is my second favourite book.  My first impression of the main character- Jo March (I watched the 1970 adaptation before ever reading the book- at the time I didn't know it was a book) wasn't a good one. I liked the fact she was a bookworm and inspiring writer like me but her somewhat unladylike brash personality and tomboyishness- along with her initial resentment towards her brother-in-law after he revealed his feelings for her older sister Meg, she seemed like a childish clod hence she irritated me. But I got to know her better after reading the book much later on and her determination to write good stories but at the same time very anxious to provide for her family and have financial independence. I admired her, I partly related to her and she motivated me. I also saw her struggles to control her temper and be more patient, finding herself and then accepting her destiny to be Professor Bhaer's wife and run a school for boys with him; instead of the independent life of a writer she'd long envisioned.

There's Meg, the firstborn and beauty of the family, the mother hen of the group, very dutiful yet longing for 'the better times' and finally realizing love was far more precious than excessive wealth; her rich friend Sally Moffat ended up envying her for her happy home, devoted husband and beautiful twins. Amy, the youngest, budding artist and initially a strong-willed, rather self-centred and selfish spoiled brat. I'll never forget the chapter where she burnt Jo's manuscript during a quarrel between them... it's a wonder she was not flogged! But later on; to my amazement and delight, she gained more maturity than I thought possible.
And there was sweet, shy Beth; the third daughter and Jo's pet- who did so much and asked for so little and the chapter 'In The Valley Of The Shadow'; Miss Alcott wrote in great detail of her death; how 'the tide went easily'; a chapter that still brings tears to my eyes whenever I read it.  Beth's death was such a huge loss and it broke my heart.
It's a lovely and classic coming-of-age story told along the lines of John Bunyan's The Pilgrim's Progress, showing how Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy went through several stages and encountered different challenges, lessons and experiences as they moved from girls to women. What I liked especially about this book was how despite their poverty and having to work hard half the time, was how they were able to create their fun; led by Jo, they staged plays and formed their version of 'The Pickwick Club' and formed their own 'post office'- their rich but lonely neighbour Laurie Laurence (who fell in love with Jo but after her wise rejection, fell in love and married Amy) joining in and playing 'brother' to them, gaining his maturity along the way, which was good as he needed it- he did not gain just from the girls but also from their wise and loving mother, Mrs March who kept the family together as best as she could while Mr March was away at the Civil War and gave her daughters and Laurie precious pieces of wisdom. At the end of the book, she and her husband saw the fruit of their labor; Meg, Jo and Amy being a huge credit to them. As for Laurie, he too had to learn some sharp lessons, including how two people who were TOO much alike like he and Jo wouldn't make a good marriage, hence his better yet unlikely pairing with the matured Amy.
Little Women has two sequels, Little Men and Jo's Boys, also good reads. But Little Women, to me, is the best of the series- reading it makes the reader feel like a silent observer of the March girls' lives as they follow each stage of their 'coming of age'.

Quote from the book:

"My child, the troubles and temptations of your life are beginning, and may be many; but you can overcome and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust Him, the nearer you will feel to Him, and the less you will depend on human power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can be taken from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength. Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and sins, and sorrows, as freely and confidingly as you come to your mother.”

SABRINA: SABRINA AND LINUS

1954 Plot: 

A chauffeur's daughter is hopelessly in love with the younger son of the Larrabee household;  womanising, fun-loving and irresponsible David. Alas, David only sees her as the little girl living above the garage with her father and barely talks to her. Sabrina goes to a cooking school in Paris and returns a refined and confident young woman and David (though engaged for about the fourth time) is smitten with the 'new improved' Sabrina- to his family's dismay as it would mean the loss of an important business deal between the two families. 
 So the older Larrabee son- workaholic and humourless Linus- decided to divert Sabrina's attention from David towards him with the plan to abandon her once David recommitted himself to Elizabeth after getting the wrong impression of Sabrina.
But the plan backfired big time; Sabrina- after some initial confusion- did fall in love with the much more mature Linus and Linus refused to admit that he was genuinely in love with Sabrina but her sweetness made him repentant enough to confess the whole scheme- hurting her. 
More for Sabrina's happiness than his brother's, Linus told David to go to Paris with her but was a shock when David informed him and the family he was going to marry Elizabeth after all. Finally acknowledging his feelings, Linus rushed off to find Sabrina and shared an emotional reconciliation on the ship already on its way to Paris. 



1995 Plot: 

Sabrina is in love with David Larrabee who hardly notices her and her concerned father, John Fairchild- hopes she'll forget the player during her time as an intern at Vogue in Paris. While she's away- David courts Elizabeth Tyson; the daughter of a very wealthy family and they get engaged. 
Sabrina returns with beauty, refinement and confidence; to David's amazement and delight and becomes smitten; to Linus and their mother's dismay as it would mean the loss of a huge business merger between the Larrabees and the Tysons. So Linus diverts Sabrina's attention away from David but it ends up with Linus getting to know Sabrina more than he ever did and becoming aware of how most people see him while Sabrina saw there was more to the dour workaholic she'd known all her life and falls in love with him, however, Linus doesn't or wouldn't admit he loved Sabrina. Instead, he confessed what he'd been doing and Sabrina returned to Paris heartbroken. David- finally mature and self-aware- recommits himself to Elizabeth and they and Mrs. Larrabee trick Linus into admitting he loved Sabrina- urging him to go after her, which he did after convincing John Fairchild he would make his daughter happy and in return was given Sabrina's address. 
Sabrina finds Linus on her doorstep and they are reconciled.

This is my favourite movie of all time, so much so that I don't like one version above the other, no... not at all! Sabrina is a modern-day Cinderella story with an incredible plot and interesting characters; a true classic. 
However, in Sabrina, it's not a wicked stepmother and two step-sisters barring the heroine's path to true love, it's class difference. The object of her affection is the son of a rich household, she's the daughter of their chauffeur. Her father however is a man of dignity who is well respected and feels that people should know their place. According to him: 

'I like to think of life as a limousine. Though we are all riding together, we must remember our places. There's a front seat and a back seat and a window in between.' 

Let's compare the portrayal of Sabrina and Linus and the relationship of the two characters- the original and the 'years late' remake.  

Sabrina Fairchild was played in 1954 by Audrey Hepburn and Linus Larrabee was played by Humphrey Bogart- shocking since this particular actor was not known for being in romantic comedies. Hepburn played Sabrina with a moving aura of innocence and sweetness; with a touch of sensitivity and tender emotion that I won't be surprised if a huge number of male fans were in love with her and her character. 

Bogie, like I said, was not a romantic comedy actor (I'd seen him previously in The African Queen, Dark Passage, Casablanca and Key Largo) but to my surprise, he played the stuffy workaholic very well. It was when Linus began courting Sabrina that I really sat up, wondering how he was going to shed the gruffness and be romantic. 
I wouldn't say he did but he adopted a sort of rugged charm when he was around Sabrina and after a while he was like a man who felt he was getting soft and trying very hard to disguise it. 

Sabrina and Linus were a very unlikely pair but I disliked David (William Holden)  so much that even though I thought Linus was very stuffy, I hoped the newly sophisticated  Sabrina would loosen him up and realize there was more to life behind a desk and have some fun for once. Their first scene together in the movie is when he finds her under one of the numerous cars in the garage and helps her up to her apartment by slinging her over his shoulder, lightly scolding her for her supposed carelessness. 
When she returned from Paris a few years later, he didn't acknowledge her greeting but warned his infatuated brother: 'The last  pair of legs that were something  cost the family $25,000.' I  wasn't pleased with that, it was like he was likening Sabrina to the bimbos David was involved in the past- all legs and no class or brains and of course, wanting David to stay committed to Elizabeth. He's not hostile with Sabrina- deciding to

handle her with kid gloves by meeting her at the tennis court in David's stead (armed with glasses and a bottle of champagne) and realised from his discussion with her that she was no gold-digging predator- just a young woman in love with his brother since she was a little girl. 

The kiss he gave her (according to him was 'from David') was a hint there was more to come between them- to us viewers that is! 

Anyhow, he had the plan- to divert Sabrina from David and make her fall in love with him. Once David and Elizabeth are safe, he will dump her with money and 'gifts' including an apartment in Paris to 'soften the blow.' However, he's not happy, not because it was a mean thing to do to Sabrina but because it was disturbing his work at the office and feeling he would make an ass of himself trying to court a woman several years younger than him. Sabrina was surprisingly relaxed around him, recalling how she used to watch him going to work as a child and urged him to try and change his outlook.

He's at first cynical, saying that 'Paris is for lovers' but finds himself unable to resist Sabrina's innocent charm and their tentative friendship turned rather playful, with him speaking the lines of French he'd learnt from her (in a rather bad accent) and Sabrina turning down the brim of his hat. But the tender look he gave Sabrina when they were dancing and the scene in the car where he quietly asked Sabrina to sing La Vi en Rose to him: 'Suppose you sing that song again. Slowly.' clearly showed he was falling in love with her. 

And Sabrina felt her feelings shifting which got her worried and confused- she urged David to kiss her repeatedly and voiced her refusal to go out with Linus again... she was confused and frightened at how he was affecting her but of course, David didn't know that at first. One would think that he would probe Sabrina about why she didn't want to hang out with Linus anymore but was just plain clueless. It's amazing, David- with his boyish charm and sentimentality- was suddenly a turn-off for her, she was now longing for the gruff, unsentimental yet mature  Linus. But it's understandable she's confused since she's been in love with David for most of her life (I'm sure the viewers- like I did- saw that love was actually an infatuation). 
Linus' love for Sabrina was evident when he confessed to her the real reason why he'd been hanging out with her but since he was denying his feelings (probably because he'd never been in love before or maybe it was pride) he mostly likely acted on remorse and guilt and he had to watch the disillusionment on Sabrina's face. And Sabrina- though heartbroken and hurt- leaves the office with dignity with a parting that clearly showed the huge class difference between them had finally sunk in: 'Goodnight Mr. Larrabee. I'm sorry I can't stay to do the dishes.' That's enough to shame anybody! 
Linus finally gave himself away when he punched David who was dishing out nasty remarks about Sabrina but in actual fact, David was trying to see what his brother felt for Sabrina and Linus, realising the trick, had to smile ruefully before grabbing his hat and umbrella and running off to catch up with Sabrina on the boat. 'If you'll excuse me, it appears I have a previous engagement,' he said solemnly but the way he ran out of the office showed how he was eager to get to the woman he loved!

At the boat, Sabrina was puzzled to receive a request to turn down the brim of a hat (like she did with Linus' previously) and startled to see Linus himself who showed her he was ready to live life to the fullest with her by hanging his umbrella on the coat of a passing stranger and without a word, Sabrina walks into his arms and the movie ended on a happy note; probably in Paris they had a quiet wedding! 

                                 

1995 Sabrina. This time Sabrina is played by Julia Ormond and while people would say she's not Audrey Hepburn, she was enchanting as Sabrina Fairchild;  with an air of innocence sophistication and grace just like Hepburn before her. But she's more modern - instead of training to be a cook, she becomes a skilled photographer after her stint at Paris Vogue. 

Linus Larrabee is played by Harrison Ford- a more ruthless Linus Larrabee, a workaholic too, with zero sentimentality and no charisma. 

David (Greg Kinnear) gives her a lift home, wondering who 'the hot girl' is but Linus recognised her instantly and welcomes Sabrina home matter-of-factly and doesn't even say she looks beautiful, while David is stunned and keeps repeating her name until Linus, exasperated asked, 'Why does he keep saying that?' 

Neither brother hardly noticed Sabrina as a child except for a few instances; so how come Linus was quick to recognise her and David didn't? Probably because David always saw beautiful faces while Linus saw people. But he was more into the family business than women; so he didn't have a jaw-dropping moment like David on seeing the 'new improved' Sabrina, except to say how grown up she looked. 

Linus and Sabrina started out a bit like wary adversaries. Linus antagonised Sabrina with 'the kiss from David' and she did what any insulted woman would do- she gave him a much-deserved slap. However, though her action was justified, Sabrina immediately apologised- horrified she did such a thing but Linus acknowledged he had it coming. In the 1954 version, the subject of money to be paid off to Sabrina to leave David alone was handled tactfully and playfully, Sabrina gave Linus the message she wouldn't take a penny from the family; here Sabrina eyed Linus over her champagne glass and firmly said no to his barely veiled offer of a million dollars.  
In this version, there is more compassion for Sabrina by the Larrabees- at least by Mrs. Larrabee. In the original version, Mr Larrabee was contemptuous of 'the garage girl', wondering why his chauffeur would give a classy name like Sabrina to his daughter and Linus retorted in her defence, 'What would you suggest... Ethel?' 
Mrs. Larrabee subtly tries to put Sabrina in her place the night she comes back by asking her to cook something for the family on a chosen day- 'to see what she'd learnt'. 1995 Mrs. Larrabee wanted to find a way to nicely tell Sabrina David was 'jerking her chain' and did not approve of Linus' plan. 'I didn't teach you this,' she said later. 
While Linus realised Sabrina was no gold digger, to him the situation was just worse- it would surely make David forget Elizabeth (who too is a modern woman- although from a rich family and is a paediatrician)  and it's bye-bye to the business merger. So he began his ruthless quest- 'I like Sabrina. I always have. But I'm not about to kiss off a billion dollars; I don't care what she did to her hair.' 
Both Linuses don't care she's the chauffeur's daughter, they are more concerned about the business deal that will come with the marriage between David and Elizabeth. And like the first Linus, this one handled Sabrina with kid gloves- taking her to the family's summer cottage in Martha's Vineyard to take photos under the pretence he wanted to sell it and hence needed photos for a catalogue. The whole trip is different from what he imagined, Sabrina does not pine for David and they learn a lot about each other. Linus finds out how Sabrina got her name and listens to her outlook on life while  Sabrina  sees the man beneath the gruff millionaire and finds herself more relaxed around him, even tells him how people see him: 'the world's only living heart donor' and 'he thinks morals are paintings on walls and scruples are money in Russia.' And without flattering him, simply said he was good at what he did- running the family business. 
When they returned from their outing and Sabrina said goodnight to him, Linus just sat in the garden, staring at nothing... one day Sabrina had gotten to him and now he was as stunned as David but more by the woman than her beautiful face and found himself doing an unselfish deed for once: donating a family owned 1800 building he'd shown Sabrina at the Vineyard to the town to be used as a halfway house, no tax advantage. 

They go out for dinner and a show and Sabrina manages to make Linus smile and laugh, which was delightful to see. This version, it seemed, was more about Linus- the possibility of how a gruff man could change by the love of a woman, a woman he could both talk to and gaze at. Sabrina gets uncomfortable when Linus asks her to say in French, 'I'm looking at what I want.' when she sees David on their return to the estate, the magic she felt with him is gone, to her shock and dismay- she can't understand why. David has finally noticed her but she was suddenly having feelings for his brother. 
The same scenario- Linus cannot go on with his plan, out of guilt (and love) and no doubt felt now that he knew Sabrina better, it turned out David was not right for her rather than the other way round, but since she loved him she could make him a better man. But Sabrina is upset and accepts a ticket to Paris from Linus- a small pound of flesh. Linus is shocked to see that David is marrying Elizabeth after all and upset at the idea of Sabrina hating him for what he did. His mother gave him her blessing to go after Sabrina after assuring him she'll get over it, 'No mother could be prouder, but I think it's time you ran away from home.' 

Sabrina is astonished to see Linus, wary about trusting him again but then comes the heartfelt speech ending:

'Save me, Sabrina fair. 

You're the only one who can.'

Then the hug and the reconciliation kiss and the movie ended with them watching the view, in each other's arms. 

                      



Sabrina is a beautiful, classic love story and both versions depicted how a girl held a long cherished dream she hoped would be a reality. It didn't, because another man- whom she made a better man- swept her off her feet instead and gave her more than she ever imagined. The film should have been named Sabrina and Linus instead- the story was about both of them, overcoming obstacles and receiving their personal growth and unexpected love... with each other.

BRAZIL 2014: ARGENTINA VS GERMANY - THE FINAL SHOWDOWN

 

Today's the day when the winning country gets the World Cup. And let me say, it's been a real exciting tournament this year; predictions were no use since it ended up merely expecting the unexpected. And the last thing everyone expected was Spain leaving early and five time winner Brazil defeated by Germany seven
 goals to one and then by the Netherlands yesterday; 3-0, with the Netherlands emerging third place. Definitely not Brazil's year at all!

Here we go: Two teams. One final match. Winner takes all. #ARGvGER #WorldCup pic.twitter.com/R8y9Juw7Ji
— Listerine Global (@ListerineGlobal) July 13, 2014

So now, the last two football teams starting on this final day are Argentina and Germany- two titans but one winner will emerge the World Cup winner for 2014. Who would it be? No more predictions from me, not after what happened with Brazil and Germany- I'm just going to sit back and see what happens.... and with this final match with a lot of tension and pressure on both sides, just about ANYTHING can happen today!
Let's see.


The match commenced after the recitation of both teams' national anthem.


30 minutes in the first half Argentina scored but alas, it was OFFSIDE! What a pity. And Germany's Christoph Kramer got injured badly enough to be taken off the pitch and substituted with Andre Schurrle. For the most part, besides close saves from both goalkeepers, the two teams battled back and forth desperately looking for  that first goal before the other. The second half would be more brutal but it's best for any of the two to get a goal, it would be a heart attack moment for all the supporters if it turned out this World Cup final would result in a penalty shoot-out. Please... anything but that!

2nd half started with a substitution from Argentina; Lavezzi for Sergio Aguero. Argentina's hero Messi almost gets one for the team and I mean almost; such a chance wasted! Higuain went down but eventually recovered and the battle went on....
Ah, who will be the winner?!!!

This match just kept going on and on and still no goal in sight... Messi again tried for one but it simply went past the net! (Argh! and *YAWN*) Will at least ONE team score already???! Higuain was then subbed for Palacio. Why not, 78 minutes in the game with no goals, they need every man they have. While I understood the pressure both teams were obviously going through, the match was getting rather boring, even with the close calls. More subs... Argentina's Perez for Gago; and then Germany's  Klose for Gotze.

The inevitable 30 minute extra time! If both teams don't score at this time, the final WILL DEFINITELY end with a penalty shootout.

Except for a few narrow misses, it was a pretty much of a snooze fest and honestly I almost hoped it would end up with the penalty shoot out... anything to get some excitement and end the match once and for all.
Oh... a German player got hit squarely in the eye and he was taken off the field for treatment, bleeding and no doubt pissed off- Schweinsteiger, and yet the player who hit him Aguero... didn't get a yellow card, I guess ruled out as accidental.

And finally Germany scored!!!

Germany's 2014 World Cup Winning Goal! https://t.co/8HVVt1R61a
— UberFacts (@UberFacts) July 13, 2014

 A memorable first goal by Mario Gotze- wow... and not MUCH time left... 5 minutes!!! Would there be time for Argentina to equalize before the final whistle? Oh my, Oh my...

Last minute sub- Ozil for Mertesacker.

Free kick for Argentina and Messi was chosen to take it... all eyes on him... and over the net the ball went!
And it's over; GERMANY WINS THE WORLD CUP!!! *APPLAUSE*

Congratulations #GER -- CHAMPIONS OF THE 2014 WORLD CUP! pic.twitter.com/ueHAP0mBlW
— World Cup 2014 (@World) July 13, 2014

Well to round off... the sad looking players of the Argentine team received their silver medals; Lionel Messi sulkily took off his as he walked away from the podium. I can imagine his great disappointment  but still... very bad sportsmanship.
Then the triumphant German team going up for their gold medals, exchanging congratulatory handshakes and hugs from their Chancellor- Chancellor Angela Merkel and then the 18 carat gold World Cup is handed over to the captain and it's fanfare and loud cheers for the German team!


 Congratulations Champions!!! 

CARBO FAN FICTION- RETURN JOURNEY: CHAPTERS' MAP

CHAPTER 1 

CHAPTER 2 

CHAPTER 3 

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12 

CHAPTER 13

CHAPTER 14

CHAPTER 15

CHAPTER `16

CHAPTER 17

CHAPTER 18

CHAPTER 19 

CHAPTER 20

CHAPTER 21

CHAPTER 22

CHAPTER 23

CHAPTER 24

CHAPTER 25

CHAPTER 26

CHAPTER 27-FINAL

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO AN ICON

This post is to talk a little about and  wish one of our celebrated Nollywood actors- Olu Jacobs; happy birthday as he clocks 72 today. Olu Jacobs is one of Nigeria's real actors- seriously this man is so good at what he does.  Why not... he was trained at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts in London- I'm yet to see another Nigerian actor able to convincingly cry without sobbing like he so brilliantly does.

My early memories of seeing him on the screen is playing the headmaster in The Second Chance (the Nigerian version of Mind Your Language) and a police detective who was always assisted in solving  his cases by his very inquisitive and  over enthusiastic daughter Uze (played by Yomi Adeyemi Wilson)- in The Third Eye. How I miss that show, since that one and another one back in the 80's The Fiery Force ( a lot darker than The Third Eye and starred Gbenga Richards and the late Funsho Alabi) and yet another whose title I don't remember- we've not had a good T.V crime series since then. 

That's not even his first 'policeman' role- he played a police commissioner in the 1979 movie Ashanti  and  a customs officer in 1980's The Dogs of War.  I saw Ashanti years ago but yet to see the latter and I hope to just to see him since I'm not really fond of war films. I wonder how many Nigerians remember his memorable villainous role in Daybreak- Omotola Jalade's movie after Mortal Inheritance where he played a millionaire, furious his young mistress (Jalade) was two-timing him again, ordered the murder of her lover only to discover after the murder was committed that the  unfortunate rival was his only son (played by Emeka Ike). Now that's a movie- I was lucky enough to find it in VCD years ago and still love it. 

Olu Jacobs is an actor the present generation of Nollywood actors should emulate. This gentleman is a born actor and they could do with precious acting tips from him, for one thing he's not guilty of overacting and he's so natural and polished, he positively stands out and owns the whole show.

 Ditto his lovely wife, Joke Silva who studied drama at the Webber Douglas Academy of Dramatic Art and they make a very good acting team as they've featured together in several projects. 

So here's wishing Olu Jacobs a very happy birthday, long life and prosperity and May his light continue to shine! 

BRAZIL 2014: BRAZIL VS GERMANY

#GER enforces their power over #BRA in a historic 7-1 rout: http://t.co/hRTx0yrFCw #WorldCup2014 pic.twitter.com/DNPHKbYF7g
— AOL.com (@AOL) July 8, 2014

I've been dispirited since our loss to France to write further on the World Cup. On the other hand, the Nigerian Super Eagles had a good run, being the only African team next to Algeria to get to the second round and I hope everyone here at home feel the same way as I do instead of criticising the team and Coach Keshi who were still rewarded by the President for their efforts. 
But I can't refrain from commenting about today's match... a historical match's filling the whole world with shock, disbelief and jaw dropping amazement. The main prediction was the five time World Cup winner Brazil would lead Germany by at least 3 goals and Germany- equally skilled and fierce on the field and have their own share of legendary players would go away with at least 2. 
But today was a shocker- to say the least! German scored first, surprisingly but no doubt the general consensus was Brazil would definitely catch up. But goodness me... the German team went from 2, 3, 4, 5 , 6 and 16 minutes to the final whistle, a 7th goal! What the hell happened, where the stalwart players that upset about Neymar's unfortunate injury that they just weren't in their game today? Who would have thought they would go out like that, this is even more shocking than the last World Cup winner- Spain- losing to The Netherlands... 1-5! That's small compared to this one; I still can't believe it myself as I write all this. 
Brazil managed to score its only goal 5 minutes before the whistle and just as well there was no extra time, they did not deserve more humiliation than they already had. 
Germany 7, Brazil 1... NOT a scenario everyone expect, probably not even the German supporters- scoring more than 3 goals and OVER Brazil! Today's score has made this match historical and I think it's best to cease the predictions once and for all and simply expect the unexpected  from now on, less chances of being terribly disappointed! 
My sincere condolences to the Brazilian team and to Brazil's fans.



 

Just in case you missed Brazil vs Germany here are the highlights... https://t.co/GPtVBRYIT4
— The World Of Funny (@TheWorldOfFunny) July 8, 2014

It's ok Brazil we're still proud of you!!! #BrazilvsGermany pic.twitter.com/bmasTkF6W9
— HD (@HDalfalasi) July 8, 2014

THE SINGLE WOMAN'S CHOICE

 The annoying lectures, matchmaking and then when everything fails; they would use the woman's age against her by saying she's not getting any younger and doesn't she want children? And if THAT still doesn't work- there is the 'guilt trap' which was sure to make her do what they want her to do if she's not firm and resistant to their subtle brand of persuasion. 
Shouldn't single daughters in a family be allowed to make her choice about when  she wants to get married instead of being lectured about not getting any older and how great marriage is? It's bad enough she's asked annoying questions about her personal life especially if she has nothing to hide but then telling her they want introduce 'a good friend' to her is just downright annoying and plain interfering in her life. 
A woman should not be told or forced to get married; no matter which society she belongs to. But one of the problems of Nigerian society is that children, especially girls, are still regarded as children and their choices and decisions never respected, there always has to be interference!
 Well meaning I'm sure, but it doesn't mean the single daughters are obligated to do what they are told because the rest of the family want her to 'settle down'. I'm not saying a woman shouldn't marry or being anti- matrimony, all I'm saying is that single women should not be pressured about  it. Besides, suppose the woman in question wants to achieve certain goals and want to lead her own life for a bit  (after being bossed and controlled for most of her life) before she 'settles down'  and has babies? If so, then she has the right to her choice and her life and the right to not be hassled by people who insist on being bothered by her single status.